But I could not be convinced.
Instead I woke up, put on my FTR t-shirt and made coffee.
Today is Recovery Day, and I am running in the 5K.
The running part is not remarkable. I do that all the time.
The exciting part is that I get to be with all my people.
It feels like that bench in the hall at high school, the one where I know all my friends will be.
We would drip from the window sill like curtains in back-packs and teenage apathy trying to decide whether or not to go to class.
It feels like Halloween night when the air is crisp and I run from house to house on scuffed tennis shoes.
It is the club when the right song comes on. The whole room pulses with energy and people dancing into the roof, sweat flailing like lady bugs from our foreheads.
After I aloud myself to be excited for this day, I read my meditation:
I know that we will not change the whole world. But Recovery has changed mine.
Exercise has been a vital part of my recovery since the beginning.
It is a way to quiet my head and center my body.
It soothes anxiety and resets my world back to the basics:
I am simply one human body.
I am temporary and I have limits.
I can also be strong, vibrant and free.
What I seek is found only on the other side of hard work.
That's why it simply makes sense for me to hang out with these people who are doing what I've been doing for years. We are celebrating our freedom.
My husband likes to tease and calls me an "FTR groupie."
But I don't care.
I am no longer plagued by teenage apathy.
I can be dorky and excited and off I go!
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