Friday, March 7, 2014

Ice cream Sandwich for Breakfast

Painted in the flow one morning in my kitchen 2005

I'm on my 3rd cup of coffee and nothing magical is coming...
Pepper ate an ice cream sandwich for breakfast.
I didn't stop her.
Yesterday I read an article from the Huffington Post titled "18 Things Highly Creative People Do Differently"
It described how I function at my best.
I am not at my best.  I am in my pajamas.
I remembered how it feels to be in the "Flow"

"Flow is a mental state when an individual transcends conscious thought to reach a heightened state of effortless concentration and calmness. When someone is in this state, they're practically immune to any internal or external pressures and distractions that could hinder their performance."

What Creative people do: let 2 yr. old Sophie paint with good brushes.
Yes.  I know this place.  It is better than intoxication, and far more productive.
I wake early in the morning.  I sit at the mirror and spin self portraits with 15 colors of line.
I write for 2 hours and am shocked to discover I have children.  They wander in with hair full of sleep and unplug me from the other world where I've been basking.  I could stay there forever, but then what would I write about?  Whose eyes would I paint for?

What creative people do: Let there kids be in charge of cookie production.
I have reclaimed the morning so many times, only to have the tide inch into shore and erase my line.
I wake up before the sun, and find my clothes in the dark.
I sip coffee in kitchen's artificial light and stair at the sand where the line used to be.
I wonder when I'll be aloud to reclaim that delicate morning space.
I lament my 34 year-old middle class life.  The one that looks just like every other Mom's in our subdivision.
Then I remember, like I did today, that I will never be aloud.
I must denounce Facebook and her mind-numbing News-feed.
I leave the laundry molding in the basket.
I let Pepper eat her ice cream sandwich, and I sneak through the door of  the wardrobe.